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Monday 29 December 2008

As I Exit 2008...

It wasn’t easy to review 2008, when looking back I realised that it’s been a huge year for me. You don’t even know the half of it!




This was there year where I truly learnt what stress, despair, depression, loneliness and guilt were. I thank God for teaching me those things. I guess they happened so that I was also able to experience and recognise happiness, relaxation, achievement, freedom and LOVE!!



I was able to look at all my friendships/relationships and understand that there are always two people in the boat and that if only one of you is rowing you should stop for a while and see what happens – that taught me a few things.

I ran many 5k races (good for my body) got good at Yoga (good for my sprit), passed some finance exams (good for my mind) and started another business (which will eventually be good for my pocket lol)

I visited Venice, started to express myself through writing and as well as getting some things published I started this blog. I made some new friends, stopped rowing for others, learned to pole dance - for exercise only I promise.

I was lucky in 2008 I won a few things like theatre tickets and dinners and someone who loves me brought me a pink DAB Digital radio where I rediscovered Jazz FM and fell in love with it.


It was a good transitional year where I started off on one journey and ended on a new one. I'm really excited to get it over and done with now though and it ends on Wednesday night at my house where I'm having a joint party with Mr Special!

I'm now in a place with an open heart where I hope to remove any last traces bitterness that I was carrying. I forgive myself for any mistakes I think I made and know that I can’t change anything that I did, I can’t go back I can only go forward, so with that knowledge roll on 2009!!



Monday 22 December 2008

So...I got chatted up...




He didnt quite look like the photo, but I just put it there for the ladies to enjoy....


The Story..

I went for my Christmas lunch with work on Friday. It started at 1pm and usually goes on until 3am. I decided to duck out at around 4ish because I was travelling to my parents the next day.


On my way home I decided to stop at the Jamaican shop and get some soup since there was no point cooking after such a big meal and I had emptied my fridge for the holidays.


When I came out of the shop I heard a car going BEEP BEEP BEEP for ages, I turned to glance as in my mind I was thinking ‘I wonder what all the noise is about’ and I saw the driver frantically waving at me.


I half smiled slightly amused and walked off. Guys Note: there is no way on earth that I would ever walk over to a car like that.


I carried on walking down the street when the same car swerved around the corner and the driver, a fine specimen of a black man leaned out of the window shouting ‘wait wait, see I’m making some serious moves for you sis just wait I want to talk to you.’


I laughed out loud and continued to walk but he mounted the pavement in front of me and got out the car. He had a friend in the car and this is the conversation….please note I try and always be polite.


Me (giggling) - “wow, you really did want to talk to me huh, you almost ran me down?”

Him - “Yeah, you are HOT…so what’s your name sexy?”
Me - “Angel”

Him (excited) “I'm Angelo we match lets hook up”
Me (laughing) - “Pleased to meet you Angelo but I have to get going now”

Him (not letting me leave) - “How old are you?”

Me - “Older than you”

Him - “How old is that
Me - “I'm a big woman”

The Friend – (leaning out of the car) “He’s a big man you know, he’s just your type”
Him - “so what are you married?”

Me - “no”

Him - “boyfriend?”

Me - “yes, of course”

Him – “so what? Can I have your number?”

Me – (laughing really loud) “NO”

Him – “Why? We can just be friends, look ok, you take mine and call me sometimes”

Me “I don’t think my man would expect that kind of behaviour from me”

Him (incredulous) “RAAAAAAH, are you hearing this bruv?” (to his friend) “this is like some perfect girl or something, did you hear what she said?

Friend – “that’s the kind of girl you need bruv, that’s the kind of girl I need”

Me – “oh well, this was nice but now I’m going”
Him – (deflated) “that man of yours is one lucky man…I want a girl just like you, so what are you really not giving me your number just cause you think your man wont like it? That’s just amazing…you are so…..so ….”

Friend – (finishing off the sentence) “its something special right there you know”
Him – “I’m going to keep driving around this area and hope I see you again, you are beautiful and faithful”



By this point I was in hysterics and just walked off. Leaving him standing on the pavement shaking his head.

On some levels I did feel slightly flattered although he was totally street, he was very attractive.

Anyway then I went home and had the best time of my life with Mr Special and as well as other things we both very much enjoyed the soup I brought.

Saturday 13 December 2008

Pizza Hut Part II

Ok I have writtern back to Pizza hut sending back the £10 voucher...they can get lost!

This is what I wrote


I was absolutely disgusted when I received your reply to my complaint.

It was a computer generated standard letter which did not answer any of my questions or address any of my issues. It was like a complete slap in the face and your message was clear, you don’t care about your customers or their experiences or feedback.

Please find enclosed the insulting £10 voucher you sent me. I would rather pay to eat somewhere that cares about their customers than eat free at somewhere that doesn’t.


I hope they reply....

FYI this is the 1st post Pizza Hut

Friday 12 December 2008

Places to see before you die…

Remember this post - where I said I had a list of places I wanted to visit this lifetime.

Well here is the full list. (At least I think that’s everywhere) Ok so it’s not exactly around the world but Id like to see these places before my time ends..




St Lucia












Holland - DONE

Venice - DONE see this post


Ghana










New York - DONE - all I did was shop and party!



Spain - DONE


France - DONE Paris years ago and can hardly remember so would like to go again!















Rapa Nui, Chile (Easter Island)


Greece - DONE (Kos Island)

Chichen Itza, Mexico















Petra, Jordan


Rio de Janerio, Brazil, Especially at Canival


Great Wall, China
















Taj Mahal, India


The Pyramids & Luxor Egypt


Cuba











Israel - DONE


Jamaica - thats where im from!!


Tobago - dont I look happy?
















Ireland - DONE


Miami - DONE - at bit like new york I just shopped and partied oh and went on the beach!




Malta - DONE



Trinidad Carnival - DONE












What do you think? Where have you been? Where you would like to go?

Monday 8 December 2008

Pizza Hut - Help me write to them...

I haven’t visited them for years, probably since childhood…but recently they have been doing a new advertising campaign after my fireworks night me and Mr Special walked past one and decided to get some food! BIG MISTAKE, I'm still traumatised from the experience.

I decided to write them a letter of complaint this is the gist of what I wrote – it was pages long so to spare you here a shortened version.


When we arrived it was clear from the start that the restaurant was under resourced, they were obviously short staffed but they were still friendly and did their best to clean a table to seat us. I walked past the salad bar and viewed the old limp lettuce and the dried up remains of the display and quickly decided that I wouldn’t be eating any of the salad. It wasn’t until we were shown our table that I realised exactly how bad things were in that place. The carpet was so dirty I think it had once been a colour but now it was brown and stained. All the chairs were filthy and probably had not been replaced since the opening of the restaurant. I actually was very reluctant to sit down because they all had dirty stains on and I really didn’t want to catch anything. The ceiling had dirt dripping down, paint was pealing off the walls and I was starting to feel very unimpressed.

I wonder if any of you at head office have actually visited and eaten at that restaurant or have you totally forgotten about it? I've, walked and driven past many of your others and I have never seen one in such a bad state of disrepair.

We ordered apple juice and it was probably the worst impression of apple juice I have ever tasted. Just as we were thinking of leaving we were asked to place an order and we both ordered the pasta. Around 30 mins later after really deciding that we should have left the staff brought over one of the dishes, it was burnt. They told us that they didn’t have the other one so we would have to share. LOL! We didn’t really need any more reasons to stay and we just left!



You won’t believe how vexed I am at the reply!! It was basically like a slap in the face, I don’t think they had even read my letter, they just sent me a £10 voucher and a standard reply. which is below


I want to write back to them sending their voucher back to them, that letter is an insult….but what should I put??


This is the letter they sent...


Monday 1 December 2008

Reminder!!

Bloggers Unite

Just a note to remind you that today is World Aids Day.

My thoughts and prayers go out to the people who are suffering right now with this disease, people who have been born with it, people who are orphaned by it and people who are affected by it.

Sunday 30 November 2008

Life, Goals and Stuff


Last week, knowing that we have one month left until the end of the year I started to look at my life, what I have achieved this year and what I hope to achieve in the new year. I started to make a rough draft of my goals.

Goal 1 - I have a list of places I want to visit this lifetime (Venice was one of them) so I decided I need to tick another place off the list and go there.



Goal 2 - I often feel a little helpless with the state of the world. Its silly I know, I cant save everyone, but I try. I work a lot with charity and am very interested in getting even more involved. So I also decided that I need to 'do more' .


So thinking about these two things I suddenly had a bit of a Eurkea moment and I realised that I can fulfil both of them at once.




I have decided to go to Ghana next year spring. This is one of the places on my list, as well as visiting I have been in touch with an orphanage out there that needs help and I'm going as a volunteer to help them. Ghana has over one million orphaned children so helping just a few of them will be very rewarding and humbling. I'm actually quite excitied.




Obviously nearer the time I'm going to write more details, and do a bit of a diary right here…so stay tuned!

Monday 17 November 2008

Venice

I take a deep breath and I imagine Venice.

I am standing on the Rialto Bridge looking out at the gondola's and river taxis dancing up and down the Canale Grande with the sun reflecting off the waters. I am strolling around the city, I'm falling in love with the history, the architecture, the coloured pasta, the Venetian masks

I am on a boat, sailing out to Murano Island watching the glass blowers shape a vase for me

I am shopping

I am eating fresh pizza made in a large stone oven shaped for my taste, followed by fresh Italian Ice cream that dances around my taste buds

I am sleeping early and waking early, I am fully rested

I am splashing around in Wellies in St Marks Square enjoying the flood on the day it rained

I am saddened that this city won’t be with us forever Did I say it was wonderful?






Sunday 9 November 2008

Fireworks & Unity


Don’t you just love fireworks? There is something so warm, fun and exciting about watching them. They take me back to my childhood when for Bonfire Night my family used to do them in the back garden. I used to hold a sparkler, eat toffee apples and the air was filled with the scent of bonfires.


Now times have changed, Bonfire nights are mostly organised, people can’t be bothered to do them at home. So last night at around 7pm myself, my special friend and around a few thousand other people walked up from Wood Green to Alexandra Palace to watch the Bonfire night fireworks display. There is never any parking in the area so the best thing to do is walk up.


I tell you I loved it, It wasn’t raining (until the display was over) the weather was mild, and the atmosphere was electric, I stood on that hill, arm in arm with Mr Special and all I could see was a sea of people, all ages and from all different races with eyes to the sky. We all clapped, cheered laughed and agghhed at the amazing display that lit the night sky. It was worth watching and just for a moment on that hill surrounded by all those people I thought to myself ‘this is what unity must be like, when no one cares about your age, sex or race and everyone is at one place at one time to do the same thing’ People must have had that feeling standing in the crowds of Times Square or Grant park when Obama was elected. I wish we could all feel like that all the time.


Anyway that’s the idealist in me – I’m off to Venice shortly so I will write and put up some photos when I get back see you soon x

Tuesday 4 November 2008

Three Quick Questions :)



Hey you

I got so busy and then I got sick so I had no time to blog.
· Did you miss me?

When I'm stressed or sick I loose all inspiration so it was hard to think of something to write.
· Have you ever got like that? What type of thing makes you loose your inspiration?


For the past four days I have been sleeping…...well in and out of sleep…and I'm still not 100% (cough cough) I had a nurse on Saturday but all of the other times I spent alone :( But being at home, resting really gave me time to think and I have already been pondering on what I want 2009 to be like

· Have you started thinking about next year yet?

I have so much to tell you but right now I have so much to catch up on so with love hugs and kisses I'm ending this post

Thursday 23 October 2008

Night Dreaming....

Last night, I didn’t get home from work until 10pm after leaving my house at 7am it was a long day! It was cold and dark outside and I was tired.

I walked into my hallway with a big sigh, glad to be home then I shouted out "hey babe"
I took off my shoes and a man appeared in my hallway, traces of sleep were still on his face, standing in his vest and jogging bottoms he smiled
"hey" then frowned "why didn’t you call me to get you from the station Angel? Its late!"
I smiled at his concern
"Because I knew you would be sleeping in front of the TV" I replied
"So?" he said
I'm always in awe at how much he cares for me
"I took the bus" I added and then quickly, before this discussion went anywhere else I stretched my arms out to him and said "I need a hug'"
He quickly obliged, wrapping his arms around me kissing my cheek and then whispering in my ear
"you want something to eat?"
Id long gone past hunger "I'm tired, I whispered back, I think I'm going to wash and get to bed"
"hot chocolate?" he asked and I giggled…
"yes please" I love it when he gets in his fussy mood…
"my lips are cold" I said
He took the hint and kissed me….

A moment later I opened my eyes to find myself in my hallway. Alone with my shoes off and coat still on, still cold and still tired. I was quickly reminded by the silence that I live alone and that there would be no one to welcome me home….I must have been daydreaming….or considering the time night dreaming, but it felt good.

Monday 13 October 2008

Incredulous! Ban 'free drinks for women'

I try not to post political stuff but I just saw the news and this article.


It actually caught my attention because it’s the first thing I have seen lately that is not about the credit crunch or the ‘Global Economic Downturn’

I don’t drink so it doesn’t affect me but surely there is a problem here!!?

Have things got this far that people are no longer responsible for their own alcohol consumption and need to be babysat on their nights out?? I know some people like to go out and get drunk but then some don’t so why should all the women that just want the one suffer??


The line where it said ‘That could mean an effective ban on cocktails with suggestive names’. Had me giggling, there goes virgin sex on the beach – I was looking forward to that!

Sunday 12 October 2008

Time to Talk


Today was stunning and I’m still smiling. Unlike my last post (a gloomy rainy day) the sun was out and it was warm. We currently have some freak October weather its great and suddenly my mood is lifted!! The picture above is the tree right outside my balcony.

I took a walk in the park with a special friend and we had a lovely talk about life, future, business, friendships, in fact everything and nothing. Don’t you just love those types of conversations? Ones where you get to express yourself fully. With this person I can usually express every feeling within my heart without fear and today I really felt the benefits.

It got me thinking that we all need to spend more time talking and listening. We need to phone instead of texting. Parents need to switch off the TV, turn to their children and ask them about their day. Couples should really take that quality time together and share problems and worries and friends need to meet up for those coffees. If everyone talked their stresses and problems away perhaps they wouldn’t take them out on us and the world would be a better place (she smiles) don’t you agree?

Sunday 5 October 2008

Gloomy days



October means autumn in London. When I look outside my window I see cloudy skies. There is rain in the air and the greyness takes away the colour of what should be beautiful season. It looks cold outside. What do you do on gloomy days?

Its Sunday afternoon right now I’m home and I don’t feel like going anywhere. Whilst there are a thousand things I could/should be doing I feel a little empty and perhaps a little sad. The radio is playing slow jams and the whole feeling, the music, the day, my mood it reminds me of the first verse of a poem I wrote for a friend of mine a while back…



Remembering Moments by Angel (1st verse)

I will never forget that Sunday afternoon,
a grey windy day between seasons.

The clouds didn’t know where to rain

and leaves danced down lonely streets;

Inside we were warm and relaxed,

as we listened to soulful radio beats.



Id love to rewind to that day….. (sigh) Oh well to cheer myself up I think I’m going to get a large mug of hot chocolate, curl up on the sofa and read a book. What do you do on cold, wet, cloudy, gloomy days?

Thursday 2 October 2008

Calm Starts

Inspired by Kyle at 12th Planet on your post off-tha-dome where you wrote 'why do people almost run you off the road in the morning on their way to work? they are rushing to a job that they really do hate!'

I used to be like that, I would snooze my alarm for ages then get up, rush rush, no time for breakfast, no time to stop and think and would speed to work with my skirt in my pants and be late anyway.

As I have matured all changed and now…here is... My average morning by Angel Smith…care to join me?

My room is full of light and my eyes flicker open five minutes before the alarm goes off, I don’t know why, I always wake before the alarm. I whisper two or three positive affirmations to myself then glance left at the empty pillow and smile. I cant wait until the day, you…who ever you are, is laying next to me. I imagine you holding me close, with your hard on pressed against me whispering how good I feel and how you don’t want to get up yet….just before my mind wanders too far, my alarm goes off.

I say alarm but it’s the radio, I aim for Jazz or Classical in the morning as they are soothing. I once had it on a hip hop station but waking up to somebody calling you a hoe didn’t make me feel good. I can’t reach the alarm from my bed, its that way on purpose to force me up, so I get up switch it off and then wander through to the kitchen.

The first thing that goes into my body is usually is hot water with a slice of lemon. Today I was out of lemon so I just took hot water. Sipping my drink I move into the lounge where I open the curtains and roll out my yoga mat right in front of the balcony doors.

Bathed in the early morning sunlight I practice yoga for around 30min then go and take a shower. I sing in the shower, something fun and empowering like Jill Scott's Golden when I'm out I get dry, cream and wrap myself in a robe and go and make breakfast.

Breakfast is going to be salt and sugar free muesli with fruit and some fresh (not from concentrate) juice. In the summer I will eat it outside on the balcony listening to the early morning birds and feeling the warmth but today its October and even though its sunny it’s cold, so I relax inside and think about my day.

After I clean my teeth I get dressed. It’s simple for me, sexy underwear, stockings a skirt and a blouse, with a jumper or cardigan on top as its cold today. I do my hair and I more or less ready to go.

I choose a handbag and shoes and pack the bag, as well as phone, purse and keys today I put in my make up which I may or may not do at work (I made a vow I would start wearing some but never get around to putting it on) an orange and an banana (I try and have fruit with me at work so I don’t eat chocolate or anything when I'm feeling peckish)

After this I leave my house…

My aim is to eat well and make myself feel good, I try and start my day calm and in a good mood so I can handle any stresses or strains of the day.

That’s about it…

How does my start compare to yours?

Monday 29 September 2008

To You - My Sunshine has come

I love being a woman; I love everything about being female especially under the admiring gaze of a handsome black man. I love feeling beautiful, sexy, soft, and girly, battering my lashes and smiling my coco smile. So when you turned up on Saturday night for our ‘dinner date’ and made me feel like a lady, you brightened my life.

I’ve been more tired than I knew, I felt lonely, stressed, abandoned and alone. I was fed up of being strong, fed up of drama, fed up of life and yet I was just trying to keep on my path otherwise I would have fallen off.

You turned up on time and with flowers! You even let me walk through the door first. Those small things that many of our men have forgotten meant so much to me. When women are let down by men we turn slightly cynical, become closed and utter things like ‘never again’. We suddenly try to do everything and decide that we can take care of ourselves. On Saturday you took care of me, and I didn’t have to be anything other than be a woman.

You won’t remember but at the restaurant when I took my coat off and you did a ‘hmmmmmm’ of approval and told me you liked my dress. I saw your eyes, you admired me and under your gaze I relaxed. Under your gaze I let everything that I was holding onto go, worries, stresses strains and I became me again and you and I just talked.

So thank you for making me feel that way and for everything else that you are.

I have a little feeling that even though a few things have happened to me that haven’t been good…from now on…life is going to be just great! I’ve made a decision to let it all go and just concentrate on being me…and you really helped in that.



Wednesday 24 September 2008

Is this what is happening to our black men?

Wow, yesterday I wrote about my experience on the train and today I saw this photo!
Its so true!!!

Tuesday 23 September 2008

Four Times on the Train

The first time I saw him on the train, I was irritated. A couple of months before that I had seen a brother steeling food in Tescos, so when this joker got on at Warren Street, this slim dirty black man I was thinking
‘is this what is happening to our men?’
He got on looked around and then he started
“excuse me ladies and gentlemen; I’m homeless and hungry…
When he had finished his begging speech there was a slight sigh of irritation around the carriage and he walked down holding out his cup.
‘Don’t hold your nasty cup in my face’ I thought as he walked by “stupid man, bringing black people a bad name” I was glad when he got off at Euston with an empty cup.

The second time I saw him on the train, I felt guilty. This same brother was back, jumping on at Warren Street. He had the same clothes on and was definitely no longer slim, he was skinny. He was really dirty this time, and looked like it had been a long time since a shave, his afro was disgusting.
‘is this what is happening to our men?’ I thought again…
He looked around and started
“excuse me ladies and gentlemen; I’m homeless and hungry and just need…
When he came past with his cup we both had eye contact
‘you shouldn’t give them cash’ I reasoned with myself ‘they just spend it on drugs’ but when he got off at Euston with an empty cup I had an uncomfortable feeling.

The third time I saw him on the train I felt ashamed. The brother stepped on at Warren Street looking like he had days to live. He had a black eye and his clothes, those same ones were all black and torn, he was bones by now, I wondered when he had last eaten or washed, a nasty stench followed him on. His beard was a tangle and his afro looked like something was living in there
‘oh crap’ I thought ‘this IS what is happening to our men’
He looked around and started, his eyes were glazed
“excuse me lades and gentlemen; I’m homeless and hungry and just need to get a little bit of cash together so that I can spend the night in the hostel and get a good meal to eat”
As he was speaking I also looked around at the people. Everyone was ignoring him and trying not to even look in his direction. Compassion overtook me and when he came past with his cup I dug in my purse and filled it.
“Thank you” he whispered and we both had eye contact. He got off at Euston as usual.

I didn’t see him after that. I wondered about him and thought to myself that I had probably killed him. I thought he would have gone and spent all my money on drugs and now he was dead and it was all my fault, I vowed never to give money to ‘them’ again. I half looked out for him at Warren Street but he never got on again.

The fourth time I saw him on the train was today. He stepped on at Warren street and I did a double take, I recognised him instantly but this was not the same man I saw months ago. This was a cleaner, fatter, healthier man with different clothes. He still looked like he was going through a lot so I braced myself for the speech…but he had another surprise for me. He pulled a little book out of his back pocket and sat down and started to read it.

I wonder if that will be the last time I ever see him…

That made my day!!!

Thursday 18 September 2008

I need to start wearing make up!

On Tuesday I went on my first theatre review assignment to see 'Do you know where your daughter is?' written and directed by Angie Le Mar. You know the more I read and research about her the more I am impressed.


For those of you don’t know she is a British comedian, writer, director and actor. She used to do the Saturday Morning show on Choice FM and also she was on the Real McCoy on BBC, which was a comedy. Good Huh? She also made history in the west end with the first ever sell out show by a female black comedian. So she is doing well.


When I came out of the show on Tuesday, I was genuinely impressed (here is my review) however I was more impressed to read all about her school and see pictures on the wall of what she is doing for the children. She wanted to give something back so she set up 'The Angie Le Mar School of Expression' a stage school for children ages four and upwards. Fantastic isn't it? Helping those lost children especially the teenagers that would probably be hanging around on the streets bored and getting into mischief . That school gives them some goals and direction and a way of expressing themselves. What an inspirational woman!


Anyway I had to grab a picture with her and she, as always looks fantastic…I on the other hand I look like….well…all I can say is the time has come where I need to invest in make-up! Lol

Tuesday 16 September 2008

Ive been told before that the good ones were taken...

After putting petrol in my car yesterday I was about to drive off when a little sign came on my dashboard saying 'OIL' then my oil light came on.

So I pulled over (still inside the garage) and decided to have a little sulk.

The thing is (deep sigh) I don’t mind being a strong independent educated women with a good job who pays bills on time I can cook and eat healthy, I can keep my house clean, change my light bulbs and take the rubbish out. I can take care of myself, go jogging have a bikini wax I can look after most aspects of my life and I do it. But one thing I don’t want to start learning about is my car.

Even though I can change the oil, I'm a girly girl and I want to remain that way (pink and fluffy) I don’t want to chip nail polish whist getting dirty under the bonnet, that’s for a man to do. (Jill Scott We/I need you). Every boyfriend I have ever had took care of that sort of stuff, even guys I was just dating, I could call them and say 'baby my car needs an MOT can you sort it?' I've never even taken my car to the garage, I have ALWAYS let a man do it as I'm scared that once the garage owner sees a woman they would take me for a ride. I've been informed in the past that my brake pads have been changed or my backlight has been replaced and for those favours I've provided my own rewards.

So I sat there for a moment feeling a bit sorry for myself with my bottom lip quivering when an Audi Convertible pulled over with a tall, dark and edible black man inside

"Are you ok?" he asked/or mouthed through my closed window?

Quickly winding down my window I replied "My car needs oil"

"Okay" he smiled…. "Do you know what to do?"

"NO……" I giggled…(lie)

Anyway...he got out his car and we both went inside the garage. On the shelf were about 55 different types of oil, so I just picked up the first one and he laughed

'No your car cant use that one'"

I didn’t have a clue what the difference was but he showed me the right one then he went outside and put the oil in, giving me a little education whilst he was doing it.

"You are a darling" I purred at him, "thank you so much"

"No problem" he replied in a deep chocolate voice "anytime"

And as he shut the bonnet I noted his shiny gold wedding ring... so that was really that.

I thanked him some more got in my car, he got in his and we both drove off.

Lucky wife huh???


© Angel Sept 16th 2008

Monday 4 August 2008

Thank God For Builders!!

On Saturday morning I was driving down the street and then suddenly I started to feel a bit of a pull on my car to the left side, I was thinking, 'what is going on?'

I wasn’t far from home so one of my best friends advised that I drive it home at least and then I sort out something from there.

He was already in South London so it would have taken him over 1 hour to reach me. He told me to put my hazards on and drive around 10/20 miles an hour.

Anyway…I started to drive back dead slow and I was worrying what I would do - I had a lot of things on that day and was worrying how I would do it all with no car. It was just starting to rain when I drove past some builders, the light bulb switched on in my head and I pulled over and jumped out. In my most, I'm a weak helpless woman voice, I said to one of them 'does any of you know how to change a tyre?' I put on my big helpless eyes and it worked!! whoohoo!

The guy I asked was obviously the boss, he was in a suit he looked at me and then down at his suit and hesitated. I could actually see his thought process, he was probably thinking that he wanted to do it, but he was wearing a suit and it was rainy and muddy.

He replied 'no problem, one of the boys will do it for you' and he called one of them over and said 'Rob can you change tyres?' Rob arrived with some BIG grin and said 'yeah sure' then another guy came over and said 'Ill do it boss' then Rob said to him 'I've got it covered, it doesn’t take two of us' then he and the other guy started fighting… I couldn’t actually believe it!! Men were fighting over who was going to change my tyre in the cold, wet and rain????????????? Amazing huh…. Anyway Rob did it, and I had to take a picture as look at what his Jacket says, what a great name! All I can say is…

Thank God for Builders

© Angel August 4th 2008

Friday 1 August 2008

Anything is Possible

I'm reading this book a colleague bought me by Jamie Andrew called Life and Limb and its probably one of the most motivating things I have read this year.

The basics of it is, he was on a climb in Chamonix in 1999 with his best friend when they were trapped by an unexpected storm. They had to spend around five nights on a tiny ledge on the edge of the mountain and although the rescue helicopter could see them it couldn’t rescue them as the storm kept it from getting to them. Anyway neither of them had food water and were slowly getting colder and colder so by the end of th e five days they were huddled close together in the same sleeping bag for warmth. Sadly his friend died up there and he ended up barley alive. To save him they had to amputate both arms and both legs.

Anyway the reason I'm writing is because with every page I turn I realise….I can actually do anything I knew it already but this reinforces it. In fact everyone who receives this email is capable of greatness in whatever you are trying to do, be it starting your business, finding a lifetime partner, loosing weight, starting exercising, changing jobs, having a baby, getting debt free etc etc.

I know you each have your personal goals so please start today with the phrase.
Anything is possible and make those changes. if you dont have goals today is the day to set them. Hell this dude with no arms or legs went on to live a full and happy life, he got a job (an IT manager) He got married (if a guy with no arms and legs can find someone then…..) he had a child (in 2004) He ran marathons (on two fake legs - here I am struggling with 5k's) but most importantly of all, he climbed mountains again raising lots of money for charities.

http://www.jamieandrew.com/content/view/30/1/

So please take ins piration and motivation from my mail and if you are procrastinating over something now is the time we are well over halfway of 2008 and I take joy in watching all of you become successful..

Friday 18 July 2008

All Men Are Dogs! or are they?

My friend AJ told me ‘I am going to ban words like ‘all men are dogs’ in my house. Like smoking and shoes, I am going to tell people don’t say them in my place. ‘Imagine if men talked that way every time a girl messed them around, they’d be uproar’

I can’t help but agree with her and I am going to do exactly the same thing. I love Black men and yes it’s true, some of them really do some hurtful, stupid, nasty, doggish things but not ALL men. So why do we say such things?

Before I answer that question I have to get one point off my chest. A man can only behave like a dog to you if they are allowed to. If you cut your association with them off from the moment you are not happy then I'm sure the dogs will eventually get the message. (If you are reading this and your dog is happily married to someone else or has a girlfriend and you know about it, then you are not only a dog too, you are dissing your fellow sista, no matter what he tells you she is like) If men learnt that the only way to get sex was to be honest, open and committed, I bet you we wouldn’t be the only demographic with the lowest worldwide rate of marriage.

Anyway I digress, I think women say all men are dogs, cheaters, liars etc because of their past experiences. Instead of taking some time out to heal and deal with the pain of their hurt, they just harbour it and eventually tar all men with the same brush. It backfires quickly on them though; they either say it so long that they begin to believe it or they end up disliking men so much that when a good nice one comes along they treat him so bad he gets out quick, making their mantra for to them.

By constantly saying negative phrases about men you are unconsciously attracting that type of man into your life.

And lastly if I was a man and was constantly told I was a dog, or I was a boy and I grew up in a house where my mother constantly said negative things about men….what effect do you think that would have on me?

© Angel July 18th 2008

Wednesday 25 June 2008

Rasta to the Rescue

This morning, when I changed tube at Euston the train was crowded. I found myself facing the door with a….well I'm guessing an Eastern European Man (by the accent) to my right.


He was standing just in my eyeline. He looked like a builder or some sort of manual worker, with old clothes and paint on them anyway when I glanced at him I saw him grinning at me in a big way, so I just frowned and continued to look forward, I had my earphones on so I just blanked him out. I could feel him staring at me so I turned to give him an even badder look to say 'hey stop' but he winked and licked his lip and blew on me.

YUCK his breath stunk so I just pulled a face…but then he whispered 'hey sexy' and blew on me some more.

I felt really sick…it was something so dirty and smarmy about the man and when his breath touched my skin it made me want to go home and wash my face.

Anyway……after a moment of feeling slightly upset…said LOUD "You are intimidating me, step off"

The whole carriage went quiet and I felt everyone looking.

"What?" he said laughing and shamed

I said "You know what you are doing so stop now, its disgusting and I feel bullied and intimated, two feelings I shouldn’t have at ten to eight in the morning"

"f**k you b**ch" he said

I was about to tell him something but then I heard some big old Rasta voice booming down, I forget this Euston train comes straight from Brixton lol, I turned around to see a giant probably around 6f4 Rasta with waist length dreads one big cap and one serious angry look. He cussed the dude big time. I never heard patois like that in my life and I'm Jamaican! Lol!


The other guy literally dived out at Warren Street (the next stop) and ran off down the platform. This was also the Rastas stop.

He turned to me and said "yuh arlight sistrin? na mek nunna dem idiyat breddas pon de train carry on wid no fool fool business okay? Stay blessed mi beuatuiful queen"

And he also got off the train. I don’t know about his life, his family, issues, emtions or habits, but I do know that right there was an example of someone who was willing to stand up for something he wasn’t happy with and that’s admireable… Thank you Rasta...

© Angel June 25th 2008